Saved Through Childbearing? The Idolatry of Women's Roles

"Does marriage have the power to save you?" This is a common question asked by many Christians– especially Christian women.

Recently, I read a book titled Holy Unhappiness by Amanda Held Opelt that discusses the myth of the prosperity gospel, along with this question. If you are unfamiliar with the prosperity gospel, it is the teaching that “faith — expressed through positive thoughts, positive declarations, and donations to the church — draws health, wealth, and happiness into believers’ lives” (Britannica).

While this sounds nice, it is not God’s reality. Unfortunately, we live in a sinful world, and while positive thoughts and donations may make some difference, they will not stop our world from being broken.

Because of this brokenness and need for God, we often chase after things that we think will save us. This ties directly to women’s self-worth, which is often defined by marriage and childbearing. It is a common misconception among many Christians that women are only saved by marrying and having children.

For years, women have been stripped of validation if they are single and childless.

I see it on social media all the time– mostly men (sometimes women) putting down other women for not living up to their expectations.

This makes me sick to my stomach, and it shows just how much we idolize marriage and having children (mainly for women). Let’s get something straight: marriage and childbirth do not save a woman. They don’t make a woman any more validated or important. The only thing that saves any of us is Jesus.

Why are we putting these two things above our Lord and Savior? Why are we not recognizing the worth and beauty that God has given every single woman?

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them” (Genesis 1:27).

I think that our society has strayed so far away from God and His intended purpose for us that we misinterpret Bible verses and we make them fit our own agenda. Our world often puts women below men, when in reality we were made equally for one another.

We need each other, instead of putting the other gender down, let us recognize these common misconceptions and allow Jesus to heal the brokenness between us.

Marriage

In a Christian society, a single woman (typically older) is often looked down upon for not being married. Many people think that marriage can save a woman and make her better.

While I do think that marriage can make both men and women better people, it can not truly ‘save’ anyone. Again, Christian societies often idolize marriage and put it above Jesus.

This is not okay and should not be encouraged. Additionally, with marriage, people often misunderstand the word ‘submission’ and how the wife fits into that. There are many Bible verses that people take out of context with this idea, often used to make women feel less than.

“Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband has authority over his wife just as Christ has authority over the church; and Christ is himself the Savior of the church, his body. And so wives must submit themselves completely to their husbands just as the church submits itself to Christ” (Ephesians 5: 22–24).

“A wife is not the master of her own body, but her husband is” (1 Corinthians 7:4).

“In the same way you husbands must live with your wives with the proper understanding that they are the weaker sex.” (1 Peter 3:7).

When you read these verses, how do they make you feel? Because I know at first glance they made me very uncomfortable, and some of them made me angry (especially the last verse).

And while the Bible is not meant to make us feel comfortable at all times, something feels off with these verses. After all, we know that God is just. Turns out… these verses are actually taken out of context, and they are not the full verses! So below, I attached the rest of them.

• “Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave his life for it… Men ought to love their wives just as they love their own bodies. A man who loves his wife loves himself” (Ephesians 5: 25 & 28).

  
  

• “In the same way a husband is not the master of his own body, but his wife is” (1 Corinthians 7:4).

  
  

• “Treat them with respect, because they also will receive, together with you, God’s gift of life” (1 Peter 3:7).

So now that we have these verses in full context, we know that both husbands and wives have duties towards one another. Both people have to make sacrifices and submit to each other in one way or another.

Women aren’t supposed to be doing all of the work in the relationship… women are not called to blindly submit to their husbands and be subjected to abuse and total control.

Wives are supposed to work with their husbands and submit to God, above all.

A church service I went to this year in April explained this beautifully. Marriage means that husbands have to die to themselves (as Jesus died for us) and lead from a place of humility.

So this essentially means that husbands have to let go of their selfish desires, and instead allow God to shine through the relationship.

Through this, a safe space is created for wives to also let go of their selfish desires and fully respect their husbands. Even in times where the husband may be struggling or failing (excusing any kind of abuse), wives should respect their husbands and try to assist them in the best way they can.

Before I move on to the next topic, I want to address the last verse I mentioned: 1 Peter 3:7.

Paul does write that women are the ‘weaker sex,’ and I want to clarify this.

There is a lot of speculation on why he wrote this that way, and some scholars argue that he means this physically or emotionally. Rather than trying to make women seem ultimately inferior and unequal to men, many think (including myself) that Paul means it differently.

Possibly, because men are (on average) physically stronger than women OR women are usually more emotionally sensitive (this is not as scientifically backed up, but I do see this play out in my own life).

I do think it is very beneficial (especially mentally) to have a strong male figure in every woman’s life (whether that be a father, friend, husband). And by the way… emotional sensitivity is not a bad thing!

I actually think that it is amazing to use to help understand and connect with people.

Back to my main point, marriage does not truly ‘save’ anyone. The Bible never specifically states this, and if you really want to know what can save you… it’s pretty obvious: Jesus.

While marriage is absolutely beneficial and is a gift from God, don’t idolize it to the point where you will treat the opposite gender with disrespect and hatred. Don’t idolize it to the point where you count on it to make you infinitely happier… because while it should cause happiness, it will not be sunshine and rainbows every day. And definitely don’t count on it to save your soul.

Child bearing

Another common Christian misconception is that a woman is ONLY saved through having children. This is a more personal concept for me, because I have never wanted to have children. I am not the biggest fan of little kids, and having kids has never excited or resonated with me.

So imagine how much it stings when I hear from people (unfortunately mostly men) that women are only made worthy by having children. Or when people say that I’ll change my mind (I might, but hearing that is so annoying, honestly).

And what makes it worse is this misunderstanding of this verse below: “But a woman will be saved through having children, if she preserves in faith and love and holiness, with modesty” (1 Timothy 2:15).

I have prayed so much about this to God, thinking that I may just be too stubborn to accept His will… but I have never once felt or heard from God that His will is for me to have children. Maybe in the future, but I don’t feel that calling now (thankfully because Lord, I’m still in college!)

Reading Holy Unhappiness, as mentioned above, was like an answered prayer for me on this situation. It made me realize how much childbearing is idolized in women and how it does not save a woman’s soul. I will not stop repeating this: only Jesus can save us. For some reason, many people believe that women are only here to procreate, and nothing else.

But in Genesis, God states that He created women so that men would have a companion (Genesis 2:18). Not to solely create children, but to share the gift of life in friendship, marriage, and harmony. Concerning the 1 Timothy verse, it is often notoriously debated.

Clearly, it cannot mean that childbearing spiritually saves a woman, because it directly contradicts Christ’s salvation in ourselves. Some argue (and I agree with this interpretation) that it may describe how childbirth brings fulfillment in a woman’s life.

While this may be true (especially emotionally and biologically), it does not bring complete fulfillment. There are still struggles and pains along with having a child– it’s not always sunshine and rainbows. My point is, childbearing is also idolized to the point where people think it can fully save them and fix their lives.

While it does bring joy to many and it brings another sense of purpose, it should not be weaponized to force all women to have children. After all, Jesus is the only person who can truly save us.

“When Jesus had said this, a woman spoke up from the crowd and said to him, ‘How happy is the woman who bore you and nursed you!’ But Jesus answered, ‘Rather, how happy are those who hear the word of God and obey it!” (Luke 11:27–28).

In conclusion, we are only fully fulfilled and saved by Jesus. It is a shame that women are often subjected to the idolatry of both marrying and having children, although that is not what saves our souls.

It is time to realize that God made both men and women in His image– therefore we are both special to Him. We are both validated and made worthy by Him. While marriage and childbearing are beautiful gifts from Him, we must not idolize them.

And this includes how men should quit idolizing complete control over women and their autonomy. That is God’s job — he has the power to advise what we can and cannot do.

We should respect both genders and leave everything in God’s hands. I pray this message would plant a seed in your heart, and I hope you enjoyed this article.

© 2026 Sienna Krieg

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Related Reads:

🕊️ Prt 1: Does God Devalue Women? Understanding Scripture Beyond Misogyny

⚔️ Prt 2: Does God Devalue Women? Understanding Scripture Beyond Misogyny

📖 What Does Ephesians 5:22 Mean?

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